Colin and Desley Marquardt on their wedding day (Photo: Marquardt family)

March 5, 2018

Almost a hundred people spilled out into the grounds of the St John Trinity Lutheran Church in Wondai on Friday morning as the church overflowed for the funeral of well-known local resident Lorraine (Desley) Marquardt.

Desley, 83, died on February 21 at Orana Nursing Home in Kingaroy.

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This is an extract from the eulogy read on  Friday:

Desley was born in Annerley on November 25, 1934 to Charles August and Irene May Dabelstein (nee Beckmann).

Mother and child were not well, so Desley was baptised on the way home from hospital at the Methodist Manse on December 6, 1934.

A lot of people may be surprised to know that Desley’s first name was Lorraine. Apparently, an aunty said her given name was “ridiculous” and called her Desley instead. Somehow, the name stuck.

Over the years, this caused a lot of confusion, particularly when Desley – who was also known as Des – was in hospital or in formal situations and referred to as Lorraine. Everyone would look blank for a minute, including Desley!

Charles was a teacher, and took Desley to school with him at East Brisbane State School.

She often spoke of how during the war years, the school became an army camp, and the East Brisbane children shared their school with students from Buranda State School. One school went in the morning and the other attended in the afternoon.

She had fond memories of that school, despite the war, mainly because it was located next to the ‘Gabba.  At lunch time, the students were allowed to go upstairs and watch the cricket from the verandah. She said they had the best seats in Brisbane.

Desley often reminisced about growing up in Yeerongpilly, where she regularly visited the Chinese market gardens, hosted visiting US soldiers during WWII, and had to take cover in air raid shelters if sirens blared.

After the war, her father transferred to Moorooka State School where she finished her education.

Desley said her father never made allowances for her at school – in fact it was the opposite!  She was often in trouble while he turned a blind eye to other students’ transgressions. 

Charles was strict at home too. Every Sunday, the family walked to church. If Desley, her brother Neville, and their sister Evelyn had been good, they were treated to an ice-cream on the way home. But if one of them had fidgeted, even once, he’d walk straight past the shop, much to their disappointment.

At home, Desley had to sleep on the verandah, which was freezing in winter and hot in summer. Her brother Neville was given the bedroom, as the only son and eldest in the family, and her parents felt sorry for Evelyn, as she was the youngest.

One day during the war, a rifle shell came through the window and landed next to her.

Desley’s faith was strong even as a youngster. She went to Sunday school and youth group at Nazareth Lutheran Church, Woolloongabba.

She finished school at the tender age of 14 and went out to work.

She excelled at her job as a seamstress at Cherie Lingerie in Queen Street and was skilled at making upmarket lingerie by hand for well-to-do society women of Brisbane.

Desley also taught Sunday School for nine years, and loved sharing God’s Word with the children. She always longed to be a teacher but women were not encouraged to have an education in those days.

She met the love of her life, Colin Leonard Marquardt, in 1954, at a Lutheran youth convention at Murgon where she was a delegate.  

She was billeted to Colin’s family home at Chelmsford, and the attraction was immediate (at least on Colin’s part!).

He often made the five-hour trip to Brisbane on a Friday to surprise Desley after work, where he’d park in Queen Street, and take her for milkshakes at the Shingle Inn.

Colin was a popular guitarist and country and western singer back then, and during concerts often slipped in the song ‘Beautiful Brown Eyes’ which was their special song, and a message that he was thinking of her.

The couple married on  August 16, 1958, at the Nazareth Lutheran Church.

Desley’s Sunday School students presented her with a plaque containing the text from Proverbs 3:6: “In all thy words acknowledge Him and He will direct your paths.” Desley wrote that this text became a part of her, and took pride of place on her bedroom wall.

That afternoon the happy couple went for wedding photos at the Colonial Mutual Building. All went well until they tried to leave for the reception and the bridal party found the exit covered by a steel grille which had been padlocked.

Apparently the caretaker had gone for a beer or three and forgotten to return!

Desley and Colin eventually made it to their reception and ended up on the front page of the next day’s Sunday Mail. The headline read: “Trapped – What A Thing To Happen On Your Wedding Day”  and the story featured a photo of the couple peering through the locked gate.

The news turned the pair into mini-celebrities. In nearly every town they drove through on their way to their honeymoon destination of Cairns, passers-by asked if they were the bride and groom from the paper!

Colin moved from the family farm to Wondai to start his married life with Des, but it didn’t always go smoothly. 

The change from the city to the country was a huge shock for Desley, who missed her beloved family desperately.

She wrote:

“The early days were very hard.  When we got home from our honeymoon, I was taken under the house by Colin’s mother Alice and shown a box with four legs. It was full of wet sand. I was told I would have to manage with that to keep my milk and butter until we could afford a refrigerator.” 

When friends found out, they loaned the couple an ice chest, for which Desley was very grateful.

The young bride used to help Colin by sorting the mail which he delivered with the cream run. She later learned to drive Colin’s Bedford truck in the paddock while he loaded hay, bags of grain and peanuts. Once, the former city girl was shocked to see a snake poke its head out of a bale of hay!

When the children Leanne,  Darren, Stuart, and Bronwyn came along, Desley had to walk herself into hospital to give birth, as men were not allowed in the delivery rooms in those days.

She often told of being briskly instructed to do her hair and make-up to “make herself look decent” before her husband came to visit her and meet each baby!

She also gave birth to a stillborn baby. This loss gave her much sadness, yet was something she was told to “just get over”. She endured a lot of grief for this child, because counselling was not given and stillborn babies were not acknowledged at that time.

Desley handled most of the child care, as Colin was busy with his work and public life, being a Wondai Shire Councillor for 18 years prior to amalgamation, and also volunteering for the Wondai Lutheran Church and other community groups. 

She was ahead of her time, ensuring her children not only had the opportunity to play sport, but were exposed to the arts, organising music and art lessons, and even taking them to the city to see the ballet, theatre and musicals. This was rare for country children in those years.

She was proud of obtaining her driver’s license after the children came along, and this also gave her much-needed independence.

Desley took the children to and from school, medical appointments, after-school activities, and continued to help Colin with deliveries.

Each morning started with a hot cooked meal, and the children often came home to find freshly baked biscuits or cake still warm from the oven. When some of the kids had allergies, Desley learned to make rye bread and flat bread from scratch, often sourcing the ingredients during trips to the city.

There was a hot family lunch every Sunday after church, and often the local Pastor and family or friends who were on their own were invited too. Leanne and Bronwyn learned to cook at her side, standing on chairs beside her until they were tall enough to reach the table.

Desley was a talented cake decorator, and always ensured the kids had a special cake and their favourite meals for birthdays.

She religiously made cakes and puddings for Christmas, sewed many of the children’s clothes, and lovingly knitted jumpers for her grand-children and great grand-children for as long as possible.

Every summer holidays, no matter how busy the year had been, Desley ensured the family enjoyed a holiday at the beach, just as she had enjoyed as a child. She also did the packing for the trips – including making sandwiches and home-made snacks for a stop along the way – and unpacked when they arrived home.

She often talked of happy times fishing with her brother Neville along the Noosa River at Tewantin, which was a tradition she continued with her children during holidays on the Sunshine Coast, also insisting on stopping for prawns and crabs to eat by the beach.

Desley often said that being with the grandchildren and the great-grandchildren was better than any medicine or pill.

One thing Des’s children always admired was how seriously she took her marriage vows. She never removed her wedding ring.

She and Colin would have been married 60 years this August, and despite her jokes, she stood by him no matter what, and always wanted him by her side.

They downsized from their family home to Colin’s former parents’ home in Wondai in 2002.  She remained there until poor health forced Desley to move into Orana Nursing Home 14 months ago. 

She fought leukemia and dementia with the same fierce determination with which she lived her life. And she loved her family until the end.

Her faith gave her much comfort, especially in her final days when she communicated that she wanted her Pastor to visit her.

Prayers soothed her when little else did.

Her granddaughter Susan was reading passages from the Bible to Desley when she finally closed her eyes and left this earth.

Her family drew solace that Desley knew she was going to her Heavenly Home and is no longer suffering pain but is at peace.

A few weeks ago, Desley was very lucid, and dictated instructions to Bronwyn which she wanted to be read to family and friends.

They were basically:

“Comfort to the Marquardt family of Wondai.  Hope they will take care of the family. Hope the friends and family will help the Marquardt family. The old ones and the young ones need to help each other.  I hope they look after one another in really bad times and even when it all settles down.  I hope everything works out for all my children. That goes for Colin, too.  Give them love.”

Desley is survived by her husband Colin; children Leanne, Darren, Stuart and Bronwyn; son-in-law Owen, daughter-in-laws Belinda and Wendy; grandchildren Susan, Robert, Mark, Thomas, Reuben, Phoebe, Tate, Chase, Harmonie; and great-grandchildren Jack, Connor, Elliana, Toby, William, and Baby B.


 

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